4 Necessary Traits of Servanthood

Guest Post by Jonathan McKee

As you read this, be thinking of potential student leaders who could join us at one of our 3 locations this summer. We’re not looking for the cute, fun and popular leaders. We’re looking for the kids who you see potential and have a heart to serve.

Would you rather have a really skilled person on your team… or a team player?

Think about it for a second. What qualities should we look for in people who want to serve in ministry?

The first quality most people shoot for is technical competence. In other words—if you are bringing a team to Kenya to build an orphanage, it would be instinctual to look for a general contractor with great “building skills.”

Are “building skills” really your first priority?

Talk to those who’ve been on numerous missions trips, and they’d probably tell you that technical competence is actually way down on the list.

My 17-year-old daughter Alyssa just left for Uganda with a team from our church, and has been reading about servanthood. In the book Cross-Cultural Servanthood, author Duane Elmer shares a fascinating example from the secular world about the qualities of good workers. The Canadian International Development Agency put together a list of qualities that they observed in a good foreign worker. The were the following, in order of importance:

1. Ability to initiate and sustain personal relationships. More important than just riding into a place like the Lone Ranger (young people are about to learn this pop culture reference thanks to a new Johnny Depp film), is building relationships with the local people and serving alongside with them, teaching and learning with them.

2. A strong self-identity (or sense of call). Who are we and what are we going to do. This allows us to be real and avoid pretense. In the church we might ask, what are our gifts and how does God want us to use them?

3. Realistic expectations. Team leaders can help cross-cultural servants avoid disappointment and frustration by preparing them for the different pace and the hiccups that can occur.

4. Technical Competence. Last on the list. “Oh yeah… can you use a skill saw?”

Interesting that technical competence was last… unless you’ve been on a mission trip. Nothing worse than a technically competent pain in the butt! What good is a person really good with tools when they alienate others, don’t see the big picture, and are easily frustrated by inconveniences?

Does this mean they don’t look for skilled workers? Not at all. Note: it’s still on the list. But it doesn’t trump the other qualities.

This translates so well to what we look for in our leaders. In a student ministry context I can’t help but think of how many times I’ve seen youth pastors select popular or talented teenaged leaders over those students whose hearts were right. What good is a really slick flyer or really funny MC if all the student leaders are a bunch of arrogant, cliquey, turds? (Something I spent quite a bit of time writing about in Ministry by Teenagers)

I wonder how many of the disciples were chosen just because of their technical competence? (I think Judas was.)

What about you?
Why do you think we allow technical competence to trump other qualities?

What qualities are you looking for in the people who serve in ministry?

Where does technical competence fall in your list?

Share your thoughts here.

GUEST POST by Jonathan McKee has become a regular guest blogger on this site! He is the author of numerous books including the brand new Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent, as well as youth ministry books like Connect: Real Relationships in a World of Isolation. You can find his excellent blog here.

Younger Generation: “I Actually Would Like A Mentor!”

Gen Y (18-30-year-olds) has been labeled many things: narcissistic, lazy, materialistic…

How about “teachable”?

As this younger generation of teenagers is graduating from high school and making life-shaping decisions: picking colleges, careers, even spouses… many of them would actually like a mentor.

In this recent Digiday article, Jack Marshall suggests that millennials value mentorship. They prefer one-on-one interaction and guidance than formalized training. Sadly, the senior staffers of most companies just don’t have time to spend with their junior employees… and it shows.

The Search Agency’s David Carrillo contends, “If you want to get the most out of millennials—or anyone for that matter—you have to take a personal interest in their growth and development.” This young generation wants consistent feedback and dialogue.

I find it funny when the corporate world is beginning to discover what youth ministers and parents have been observing for years: one-on-one time with our kids reaps great rewards!

Yes, some would argue that young people today don’t want to be told what to do. This, like many myths about millennials, seems to be more of a “life-stage” trait than a generational trait. In fact, I find this group to be quite teachable if you invest in them. Author Tony Wagner agrees, proposing we need to put on our coaching hat with this young generation, working collaboratively with them, even holding them accountable. They value the attention because they want to succeed. And when we invest in them, they “produce extraordinary results.”

Here are three ways I find that parents, coaches, youth workers and managers can get the best out of this young generation:

1.    Make face-to-face time a priority.

Young people love communication, and nothing beats good ol’ fashioned face-to-face time. I find the best way to coach young people, or disciple them and develop leadership skills is by connecting with them one-on-one. Parents can attest to the effectiveness of this methodology. In addition to all the hang-out time I spend each week with my daughters, I take each of them out for breakfast or coffee once a week. This is a regularly scheduled date. My best conversations with my daughters have always been during this time.

2.    Use your smart phone, then shut it off.

This young generation loves their smartphones. Now that the majority of them own these little gadgets, use texting and social media to keep in touch with this generation, but not as a replacement of face-to-face time. In my book, The New Breed, I discuss the importance of knowing when to use Facebook and when to use “face-to-face” conversation when coaching this new breed of volunteers. Personally, I like using the smartphone to keep in touch with young people, even my own kids, but then I seek out face-to-face encounters where I turn my phone off, clear any distractions aside, look them in the eyes… and listen. (NOTE: Organizations should have clear guidelines about appropriate communication between mentors and minors. Technology isn’t taboo for connecting with kids, but good guardrails should be in place.)

3.    Look for Opportunities for Encouragement

Sound basic? Then why is this so overlooked in the home and the workplace? This young generation craves feedback, and as much as they need criticism, we mustn’t forget to affirm them in their daily tasks and tell them how much we appreciate them. I learned this the hard way with a Gen Y intern years ago. She did a project and did 97 things right and 3 things wrong. I spent the majority of our time talking about the 3 things, ignoring the 97. DON’T ignore the 97!!! It’s okay to talk about areas of improvement, but start with positive feedback. Send little texts of appreciation. Tell them specific feedback like, “Great job on that report yesterday. I love your example of the honey badger in the second paragraph!”

The world isn’t short on providing negative generalizations about this young generation, and there’s definitely some truth to some of these accusations. But the real question is… are you willing to invest in them? Because most the research is showing, when you invest in this generation, they prove to be well worth the time.

Question: What else do you know to be true about Gen-Y… Share it here.

GUEST POST by Jonathan McKee has become a regular guest blogger on this site! He is the author of numerous books including the brand new Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent, as well as youth ministry books like Connect: Real Relationships in a World of Isolation. You can find his excellent blog here.



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5 Ways to Put Christ Back in Christmas

GUEST POST by Jonathan McKee has become a regular guest blogger on this site! He is the author of numerous books including the brand new Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent, as well as youth ministry books like Connect: Real Relationships in a World of Isolation. You can find his excellent blog here.

As December progresses, and the business of the holiday creep in… sometime Jesus gets shoved out.

Don’t worry, I’m not being a Scrooge. I love Christmas decorations, hot cider and presents as much as Ralphie loves his Red Ryder B.B. gun. I just don’t want those things to get in the way of the greatest present we’ve ever received… the birth of a baby who would make not only change history, but would save us all.

Here’s 5 simple ways to put Christ back in Christmas this December:

1. Read the story. Start reading the book of Matthew or the book of Luke together—each begins with the Christmas story. It doesn’t matter when you read it. My family is currently doing it after dinner while we’re still gathered around the table. We probably only have family dinners 4 or 5 times a week, because of busy schedules, but that still gives us 4 or 5 chapters a week. Who knows… maybe the habit will stick and you can finish Luke and move on to the book of Acts in January.

2. Choose to serve. Find a way that your family can serve together during the holidays. A few years ago my family decided to each choose an activity we’d do during the holiday break. One of us chose to go downtown and pass out McDonalds gift certificates to homeless people. Another chose to call up the local mission and serve in the soup line. The possibilities are endless. Find a way to get your hands dirty and help the “least of my brethren” this Christmas.

3. Give. Gather together as a family and choose an individual, a missionary or a ministry to give a special gift to this Christmas. World Vision has a great gift catalog where your family can choose to buy a goat for a needy family overseas. Your city probably has some great missions that feed the needy. Or you might know a family in need in your church or neighborhood. I remember a few years ago when a family in our church was really struggling and didn’t have any money for presents for the kids, or groceries, for that matter. Our family pooled together a few hundred dollars and bought some Wal Mart gift cards, giving it to the family anonymously.

4. Tell the story. About 5 to 7 years ago, I gave my kids a challenge. I told them: “On Christmas day, each of us are going to tell the Christmas story in some unique way. You can use art, drama, technology. No rules. Just choose a creative way to tell the true Christmas story. I dressed up as a Shepherd with a Jersey accent and told the Christmas story first person. My daughters teamed up and did a play. My son drew. Each of us told the story using our own gifts.

5. Experience the story. This is a good one for all you kinesthetic learners who like to learn by doing and experiencing. Some towns offer live manger scenes where people act out the Christmas story. Some churches have Christmas plays. If you don’t have these available, then go outside under the stars, light a candle and read the story of the shepherds (Luke 2). Worse case… rent the movie The Nativity. Just do something where you can see, hear, and maybe even experience the Christmas story.



Question: What about you? What are some ways that you have put Christ back in Christmas? Oh, do share right here!


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