care

10 Ways to Show Your Small Group Leaders You Care

December 17, 2012 by doug 6 Comments

I know a lot of youth groups slow down a little or take the next couple of weeks off (during Christmas Break) and small group leaders get a little break. That’s a good thing! During this time, it’s great to make sure they know they’re loved and valued and essential to the health of your youth ministry. Drop them a short note or a quick text or a Merry Christmas… anything that communicates value.

As you prepare your care structure for next year, consider these 10 simple ideas to show small group leaders how important they are:

1. Call them the day of their small group. Take notes on the conversation and follow up with them the next day or week about something they said they were going to try in their small group.

2. Whenever you send something to your own small group students, make extra copies and send them to your small group leaders as examples.

3. Email them as a group and let them know about a lesson you taught or something that “worked” with your own small group.

4. Send them articles that you read about teenagers, culture, family or youth ministry in general.

5. Mail an actual note letting them know how much you appreciate them and couldn’t do ministry with out them. EVERYONE loves getting mail!

6. Ask them how you can pray for them personally… not just for their ministry to teenagers.

7. If they use the words, “If I only had…” or “I need to find a… ”… try to get it to them! How nice is it when someone else makes your job easier for you?

8. When you come across a teenager who is in a small group, ask him/her if they’d write their small group leader a note of affirmation (offer to mail it for the student).

9. Schedule a short, face-to-face meeting before or after youth group/church/etc… Get in the habit of regular “just wanted to connect and see how you’re doing” meetings. Let them know they’re not alone.

10. Send a short email reminding them that you’re available to answer any questions they might have about their small group. Do this often… ministry to teenagers can sometimes be lonely!

I realize these are very basic (and doable) ideas, but there’s a lot of power in the simple, basic ideas that communicate concern for your leaders. Leaders typically don’t leave a ministry, they leave leaders. Be the type of leader that your volunteers don’t want to leave.

Question: What else would you add to this list? Share it here.

[Are you getting Doug's daily blog in your email inbox?] If not, it’s real easy–go here.

Filed Under: Leadership, posts, youth ministry Tagged With: care, conversation, follow-up, Leadership, shepherds, small group leaders, teenagers, volunteers

BETTER TOGETHER: 9 reasons why networks work!

April 25, 2011 by doug 12 Comments

.
The more I speak with youth workers the greater the need I see/hear for them to connect with others like themselves. This isn’t a new song that I’ve been singing (here I am saying at the Simply Youth Ministry Conference in 2009), but it is one worth repeating. Youth workers need one another…Networks work!

Here’s my list of 9 reasons I believe youth workers should regularly connect with other youth workers:

1. A network is a place to combine resources

When you’re connected with others you can share resources. Practically, this saves you valuable time and money and makes you a relational steward.

2. A network provides a “culture of safety”

One of the reason I love meeting with other youth workers is because I feel safe. I feel understood. I feel known. This is a result from meeting with those who know what I do and what I’m usually feeling/going thru.

3. A network allows us to learn from others

Every time I gather with youth workers I’m amazed at how much I learn by simply listening to their stories about church, parents, teenagers, volunteers, etc… Other people’s life experiences are a classroom for those willing to learn.

4. A network can be an ideas’ factory

I love hearing what other youth workers are doing. When we share ideas, it’s so much easier to “steal” with permission. My favorite network gatherings were when we would show up every month and share copies of all we had done during the month.

5. A network provides free counseling & consulting

This one is HUGE! So many of the questions that I receive to answer on our SYM podcast could be better answered if they were asked within the community of other youth workers. Veteran youth workers are really sharp people and can aid with personal and strategic questions.

6. A network expresses the diversity within the body of Christ

One of the many elements that I enjoy about meeting with other youth workers is the theological melting pot that shows up. If you choose to meet with people in your own denomination, great! But if not, you gather with people who are theologically diverse and have much to offer (diverse, but unified on the essentials that are important to you).

7. A network allows you to be community-oriented

I love it when networks pull off events for either the local community or the faith community. It’s so great to see youth groups doing things they probably couldn’t do on their own but can pull-off because of the connections within their network.

8. A network models non-competitive church relationships

Teenagers need to see that youth groups are willing to work together to do things they can’t do on their own. The youth group down the street isn’t the enemy—the Enemy is the enemy—we need to model that reality

9. A network provides genuine fun and friendships

Networks that meet consistently and for long periods of time become the foundation for great long-term relationships. I’ve experienced this personally and I’ve seen a depth of friendships forming across the country from those who said “yes” to a network gathering.

Bottom line: as youth workers we are “better together”! If you’re not currently connected with a group of youth workers, PLEASE click here and begin searching for one near you.

Chime in! Two ways I’d love to hear from you: (1) What’s the reason that I’m missing? Let’s get to #10. (2) Are you part of a strong network? Let me know about it.
.

Filed Under: Church, Leadership, posts, SYM Podcast, youth ministry Tagged With: care, doing life together, Network, networking, NNYM, podcast, questions & answers, youth ministry

EMPATHY: teenagers need it, I need to develop it

February 28, 2011 by doug 8 Comments

Every Wednesday night my small group of 9th grade boys leave my house and I’m totally exhausted. Significant conversations drain me. I realize you might think, “Really, you can have significant conversations with teenage boys?” Well, not all of them…but, usually one each night and I’ve come to realize that expressing empathy drains me.

Mother Teresa once said, “Empathy is YOUR pain in MY heart.”

What does empathy communicate to a teenager? It reveals a heart that cares. It sends a message: “I care about your hurt. You matter to me.”

Think of two teenagers that God has entrusted to your care:

Do you know their current grief?

Do you feel their continual pain?

When was the last time you took the time to really listen to their hurt?

Is there a strong enough relational connection that their pain hurts you?

I find it really easy for youth workers to remain at the superficial level with teenagers and talk about how their week went and then leave thinking, “It’s nice to be relational with teenagers.” But, in reflection, rarely do their conversations submerge beneath the surface.

I’m not suggesting that we share a meal with a teenager and break the ice by saying, “So what’s been your worst sin this week? What pain has it caused? Let’s talk about it… you gonna eat those fries?”

But, if you and I are going to learn to be the type of person/leader/minister who powers through surface agendas, discerns real life hurts, and reveals concern…what are the essentials that need to be developed?

I want to learn to be more empathetic. Let’s learn from one another. Chime in and help me. Where’s your struggle? What’s your strength?